Topic:People think the public library will be replaced by the computer.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?.
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People think the public library will be replaced by the computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?【写作要点：扣题、简洁】
In the 21st century, the sweeping trend of information technology is increasingly popular in different arenas ranging from office daily work to public transport control to the imparting of knowledge. However, there is no unanimous【这里感觉重复了。后面本来就是“共识”的意思，前面又用“无异议”来修饰，是不是画蛇添足了哦？】 consensus yet on whether public libraries should be totally digitized. Some people suggest that computers should be used to replace the role of traditional public libraries. As far as I am concerned【有点罗嗦哦】, I think this view is overly【又重复了】 simplistic.
In the 21st century, the sweeping trend of information technology is increasingly popular in different arenas：from office daily work to public transport control to the imparting of knowledge, modern technology is almost found anywhere. However, there has not a consensus yet on whether public libraries should be totally digitized. Some people suggest that computers should be used to replace the traditional public libraries. In my viewpoint, this view is simplistic.
Convincing evidence can be made that traditional public libraries have played a pivotal role in our society and numerous residents have got accustomed to them. To begin with【总觉得这句放在句首比较好。Begin嘛，就开头罗^^】, like a sacred treasure of knowledge, the libraries and their collections help with guaranteeing the successful inheriting【这个词很陌生。用heritage怎么样？】 of knowledge and skills passed down through ages from our ancestors. Therefore, studying in a library is and will continue to be【为什么可以持续下去？没有论点支持哦】 an important means to inculcate【能说明一下这个词的用法嘛？】 skills and knowledge, particularly in less developed areas around the world. Further, for many of visitors, reading an interesting book in a quiet environment can afford them amusement and entertainment, while searching information in front of a computer is stressful and tired. That is to say, not only has a library supplied a place for readers to seek knowledge, but also help them relax their body and ease their mind.
Convincing evidence is from the fact that traditional public libraries have played a pivotal role in our society and numerous residents have got accustomed to them. Like a sacred treasure of knowledge, the libraries and their collections help us with learning knowledge and skills passed down through ages from our ancestors. Therefore, studying in a library is an important meaning for passing down assorted skills and knowledge, particularly in less developed areas around the world. Furthermore, for many of visitors, reading an interesting book in a quiet environment, is an amusement and entertainment, while searching information in front of a computer is stressful and tired. That is to say, not only has a library supplied a place for readers to seek knowledge, but help them relax their body and ease their mind.
On the other hand, computers can exert certain effect to improve the efficiency when searching information. Supporters claim that some technologies, such as Google and yahoo searching engines, as well as some other online digital databases, can be of great help, since we find a suitable article in one second if correct key words have been typed【还真详细……不过ahu个人觉得，举例最好是为了论证自己的观点，不要去论证反面的观点啦！】. Nevertheless, they disregard the fact that the huge disparity between cities and countries【这里是拿城市和国家相比还是城市与城市、国家与国家相比？】 is increasingly serve. Urban government can easily afford a computer and its related costs while their counterparts in rural areas are capable only of supplying a library of inferior quality.
On the other hand, someone claims computers can exert certain effect to improve the efficiency when searching information. They argued that some technologies, such as Google and yahoo searching engines, as well as some other online digital databases, can be of great help. Nevertheless, they disregard there are huge disparities among cities and countries. Urban government can easily afford computers or related costs, while their counterparts in rural areas are capable only of supplying a library of inferior quality.
Based on all the arguments offered above, it is manifest that much as computers may improve the efficiency of study【以前新概念讲过的much句型，赞一个！豆子应该是最能将课文句型用在写作中的了！】, it can hardly measure up to the expectation of a spiritual pleasure, not to mention the high cost to afford it.
Based on all the arguments expressed, it is manifest that much as computers may improve the efficiency of study, it can hardly measure up to the expectation of a spiritual pleasure, not to mention the high cost to afford it.
个人感觉主要要注意的就是主题的紧扣和语言的简洁啦。或者词汇用的都很高级，但是扣题不紧、词汇过分华丽，会起反效果哦！【当然这只是针对想要拿到雅思7分以上的高分要求。如果只是6分的要求，豆子就不用拿来我们批改讨论啦～～^^】
以下是豆子中的学习知识小结：
P1:
1.the sweeping trend of information technology is increasingly popular in different arenas:。信息充斥的技术在不同的地区越来越流行。
————sweeping:n. 扫除,垃圾 a. 扫荡的,彻底的,广泛的
————最妙的是后面的冒号,让文章不死板，学多应试的连词...最简单的反而弃而不用。
————领域中的顺数：from...to....to ...to....(电脑科技联系的世界杂七杂八总说：office daily work,public transport control， the imparting of knowledge，本来还想补充些其他的，发现都太微观了，很多都包括在豆子的范围呢 OTL...)
2:However, there has not a consensus yet on whether public libraries should be totally digitized.
-------digitize:使之数字化
————there has not a consensus yet on whether
自己会的。繁杂多了，不好：there is no consensus of opinions among people as to the view of
————simplistic：过分单纯化
P2:
1.Convincing evidence is from the fact that traditional public libraries have played a pivotal role in our society and numerous residents have got accustomed to them.
--------Convincing:a. 使人信服的,有力的,令人心悦诚服。
--------对于旧事物有着难以割断的适应感，都可以套用这个句子。
2.Like a sacred treasure of knowledge
passed down through ages from our ancestors.
passing down assorted skills and knowledge传承已分类的技巧和知识（
这才叫大学生该说的语言）
particularly in less developed areas around the world（时刻保持对第3世界的关注）
————sacred：神圣的，上帝的,庄严的,祭祀的。
P3:
1.exert certain effect to improve the efficiency (偶只会傻乎乎的用.take effect on)
2.Supporters claim that some technologies, such as Google and yahoo searching engines, as well as some other online digital databases, can be of great help, since we find a suitable article in one second if correct key words have been typed(对于网络查找说的好详细的说^^)
---------digital databases:数据化数字库
3.Nevertheless, they disregard the fact that the huge disparity between countries and countries（以后国外再说中国哪不对哪不民主旧可以用这句啦，国情不同的说）
P3:
Based on all the arguments expressed, it is manifest that much as computers may improve the efficiency of study, it can hardly measure up to the expectation of a spiritual pleasure, not to mention the high cost to afford it(0.0太完美了。。背诵）
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因为本次作文跟曾经雅思出过的一道有官方高分作文非常相似，特此贴出给大家参考一下：
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题目：
When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
高分作文：
Overall, I disagree with the opinion expressed. I would like to begin by pointing out that "traditional skills and ways of life" are not automatically of one country, but of a culture or community.
In many ways, the history of civilization is the history of technology: from the discovery of fire to the invention of the wheel to the development of the Internet, we have been moving on from previous ways of doing things. Some technologies, such as weapons of mass destruction, are of negative impact. Others, such as medical advances, positively help people to live better or longer, and so very much help traditional ways of life. Surely, few people would seek to preserve such traditions as living in caves!
Interestingly, technology can positively contribute to the keeping alive of traditional skills and ways of life. For example, the populations of some islands are too small to have normal schools. Rather than breaking up families by sending children to the mainland, education authorities have been able to use the Internet to deliver schooling online. In addition, the Internet, and modern refrigeration techniques, are being used to keep alive the traditional skills of producing salmons; it can now be ordered from and delivered to, anywhere in the world.
In conclusion, without suggesting that all technology is necessarily good, I think it is by no means "pointless", in any way, to try to keep traditions alive with technology. We should not ignore technology, because it can be our friend and support our way of life.
点评：
Overall, I disagree with the opinion expressed.（第一句话当中，作者直接说出了自己的观点，这有点区别于我们中国学生通常所使用的背景开头方式，但是它在这个开头中也使用了两个中国学生不大使用的结构，一个是overall，另外一个是过去分词做后置定语，既expressed） I would like to begin by pointing out that "traditional skills and ways of life" are not automatically of one country, but of a culture or community.(作者在这个地方所提出的观点非常的犀利，同时使用的结构也很不错， 我们现在来看一下，I would like to do 我想做...，这个结构是中国学生都非常熟悉的，但是他随后使用的by doing就比较的标新立异，随后他又使用了一个宾语从句，这样结构就丰满起来了。同时，作者对于标点符号的使用也是非常具有特色的，这里面的符号确实起到了加强的作用，同学们以后要注意对于标点符号的使用。另外，这里面的连词but虽然不是很难，但是却是用的非常恰到好处。希望大家可以借鉴这样的一种写法。再者，这里面，考官没有使belong to这样的结构来表示属于，而是很简洁的使用了be of，这说明，简洁的表达受到了考官的关注。更为重要的是作者给出了一个别人都不大容易想到的观点，传统的技能以及生活方式并不是自然的属于某一个国家的，而是属于某一种文化和区域)
In many ways, the history of civilization is the history of technology: from the discovery of fire to the invention of the wheel to the development of the Internet, we have been moving on from previous ways of doing things.（这个句子是由40个单词所组成的，其中含有的结构都是中国学生耳熟能详的，但是大家需要注意如下的3个特点：1，考官在这里所使用的开头句就非常具有震撼力：“在很多方面来说，文明史就是科技史”，大家想想，你们在写作文的时候有没有这样的一种思维观？2，考官再次显示了标点符号的重要性，大家在举例的时候是不是比较喜欢使用for instance和for example？而考官在这里面就只使用了一个简单的"："，令人很绝望啊！佩服的绝望，他的使用不仅最简单，而且最准确。随后它所举的例子是Mars在分析近期高分作文的时候经常发现的一种结构，既排比，这种结构现在在8分以及满分作文中屡见不鲜，成方兴未艾之势，我想原因就在于它的一种力量性。大家应该好好的把握这种结构。3，思想的连续性也在这句话中得到了充分的体现。作者开头说的是文明史就是科技史，随后在举出了例证之后，自然引导出了这样的一个观点，我们的进步是以坚持传统方式为起点的。思想并证明着。大家应该记得这样的思路。）Some technologies, such as weapons of mass destruction, are of negative impact. Others, such as medical advances, positively help people to live better or longer, and so very much help traditional ways of life.（在这句话当中，作者非常巧妙的使用了对比法，一开始说，很多科技，比如大规模杀伤性武器，是存在负面作用的，而其它的科技，例如医学进步，则积极的促进了人民生活水平的提高，延长了人的寿命，从而极大的弥补了传统生活方式的缺陷！大家看到了没有，作者在对比的同时还在举例子，不厌其烦的举例子。例子是多么的重要啊！ Surely, few people would seek to preserve such traditions as living in caves!（作者在丝丝入扣的分析，旁征博引之后，忽然话锋一转，举起了批判的板斧，砍将下去。一语双关的说道，当人们还生活在洞穴当中的时候，很少有人会去保护这种传统的！这个可以理解为，当技术还没有发展到一定程度的时候，文化还很落后的时候，人们是不可能想到保护文化的。同时人们住在洞穴中这句话还可以理解为坐井观天，说狭隘的人怎么会想到保护文化，非常之犀利）
Interestingly, technology can positively contribute to the keeping alive of traditional skills and ways of life.（作者在段首又开始发飙了，又提出了一个具有建设性的观点，说有意思的是，科技可以在保持传统技能与生活方式的生命力方面做出积极的贡献） For example, the populations of some islands are too small to have normal schools. （他又开始举例子了，一个离开例子就不能活的刀笔手。注：刀笔手指写文章很厉害的人，他可以用笔做刀，同时可以用刀把文章裁减成他想象的任何样子，而且不留痕迹，并且可以杀人于无形。高手！这个例子初看比较奇怪，说，很多岛屿中的人口太少，建立正规的学校是不可能的。这个和科技有什么关系啊！？但你看他后面说的话）Rather than breaking up families by sending children to the mainland, education authorities have been able to use the Internet to deliver schooling online.（他在解剖这个例子，教育专家已经能够通过因特网将课程传到网上，而不需要使孩子离开家庭来到大陆。这个角度是不是很刁钻？！） In addition, the Internet, and modern refrigeration techniques, are being used to keep alive the traditional skills of producing salmons; it can now be ordered from and delivered to, anywhere in the world.（作者在这里面使用了一个比较诡异的写作方法，意识流！！！居然是意识流！！！当初JAMES JOYCE（詹姆斯乔伊斯）就是靠这个写作技法独步文坛。创作出了另世人惊奇的<尤利西斯>。本文中，考官通过岛屿孩子的例子说明了因特网的好处，同时又用因特网举出了另外的一个例子。明白这个写作思路吗！A-B B-C C-D，如果没有篇幅的限制，他可以任意的导出。而且他这次的例子又是那么奇怪，居然说的是因特网以及现代的冷冻技术的应用使得传统的马哈鱼加工工艺保留了下来。现在，马哈鱼可以在全球达成定购与收购）。
In conclusion, without suggesting that all technology is necessarily good, I think it is by no means "pointless", in any way, to try to keep traditions alive with technology. We should not ignore technology, because it can be our friend and support our way of life.（收尾段，考官写的很平易，比较厚道，但是也有锋芒藏在其中。他先是使用了一个介词结构without suggesting，表明他并不认为所有的科技都是好的，然后又说，他认为也不可以说使用现代科技保护传统是没有意义的。最后的一句话有点作报告结束时候的感觉，我们不应该忽略科技，因为它可以成为我们的朋友也可以对我们的生活方式起到支持作用。他传统文化也要了，技术也没扔，总之是完美结局。Start well, end well.）
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学习知识小结:
1：Interestingly, technology can positively contribute to the keeping alive of traditional skills and ways of life. （说科学比较生动的话语）
2：I think it is by no means "pointless", in any way, to try to keep traditions alive with technology.
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我的作文：
Nowadays,going online is a widespread habit in the world.Computer exerts certain effect to improve the efficiency when searching information and reading book free.
Due to this fact, some people think the public library will be replaced by the computer.They argue that with the development of modern science and technology,public library don't suit today's society that is not what it was. But others believe the public library sitll play a important role in our society.Many people assumed the customs of going to the public library on Sunday.There is no consensus of oponions among people as to the view of whether the public library will be replaced by the computer.
From a certain point of view,these remarks may sound reasonable.As far as I am concerned,I agree with the latter opinion.There's saying many residents have got accustomed to them.With regards to the public library,we like its slient and eased ambience,rather than applying of computer.After all,we can search information on computer at home or internet cafe.
But in fact,I think if the public library is flush with funds,it also should afford a computer to improve its service quality. Technology can positively contribute to the keeping alive of the library,I believe the library will keep space with times.
其实之前写的比这个还要烂好几倍。。。。
Nowadays,going online[surfing the Internet,网上冲浪] is a widespread habit in the world.Computer exerts certain effect to improve the efficiency when searching information and reading book [for]free.
Due to this fact, some people think the public library will be replaced by the computer.They argue that with the development of modern science and technology,public library don't suit today's society that is not what it was. But others believe the public library sitll play a important role in our society.Many people assumed the customs [什么意思啊]of going to the public library on Sunday.There is no consensus of oponions among people as to the view of whether the public library will be replaced by the computer.
From a certain point of view,these remarks may sound reasonable.As far as I am concerned,I agree with the latter opinion.There's saying many residents have got accustomed to them.With regards to the public library,we like its slient and eased ambience,rather than applying of [a]computer.After all,we can search information on computer at home or internet cafe.
But in fact,I think if the public library is flush with funds,it also should afford a computer to improve its service quality. Technology can positively contribute to the keeping alive of the library,.[Technology should never render a library outdated. Rather, high technological facilities can positively contribute to the better performance and well development of the library.] I believe the library will keep space[pace] with times