I'm badly ill and I feel upset.

I haven't written a diary for over two weeks,I feel ashamed of myself.

On the first week,I went home to look after my parents,my home is thousand of miles away from the city which I work in,it took me more than 20 hours to go home by train,I had only 4 days, there was not much time for me to stay at home,and I want to have more time to be with my parents,so I never got on the Internet to write a diary.

On the second week,I went back work from holiday,after the long trip on train,I felt so tired,I even didn't want to work,so I had an excuse to not write a diary.

Although there are some objective reasons,I still feel ashamed of my laziness,I can't make the same mistake any more.

Early this morning,when I got on the Internet,I was shocked by the news"two students jumped from a building and died immediately"(http://news.qq.com/a/20090415/000103.htm).

I remembered that a similar accident had happened on the first day of this month,a college student from Hua zhong University of Science and Technology,killed his girlfriend and then suicided.

According to the report,more than one hundred colleges students suicide every year in China,and the suicide rate is rising year after year.

I feel very sorry for these sad news,I feel pity for them but I hate them,why they don't cherish their beautiful lives and break their parents' hearts.

I admit that the college students in China are under great pressure nowadays,especially the graduate students,they face fierce competition in the process of finding jobs.If they can't  find a suitable job for a long time,they might be despaired and can't stand the failture.Then they would choose to suicide,they think their distress would be over after they died.

But they don't know that  they leave endless distress to their parents and friends who love them very much,they don't know  that no matter they can have a good job or not,only if they are healthy and live happily everyday,theri parents and friends still love them as much as usual.they also don't know that people can go over any kind of difficulities except death,there is always a way out as long as we are optimism and strong enough.

There are many reasons causing the college students so brittle.the parents spoil the children exceedingly,Under the spoil from the parents,the youth always think the voyage of lives are unbroken smoothness. The teachers never teach the students how to face failtures,they always ask the students to study hard and find a  good job.only the students can enter a famous unversity or find a good job,they are successful and can get big achivement.So once they can't get what they want,they become impatient and lose the mind to work harder.

 I can't understand why so many students choose this way to avoid the pressure,I hope we all youth have the courage to face all difficulties in life,and live optomismly no matter what happens in life.

When I was a student in school,I always liked to buy beautiful clothes and some funny toys,I didn't know how to save money and I didn't have the sense of saving money.When I had no money,I called my parents and asked them to send me some money.

After I graduated from the university and began to work,I felt it was a shame to ask parents to give me money,so I made up my mind to  raise myself by hard work.Then I began to earn money.

In the first few weeks after I began to work,because I didn't know how to arrange my salary and how to earn money,I always spent  my money over when there was a few days till the changeless day of wage.Then I still had to live by my parents' relief.

After a few months,I gradually got some experieces,when our salary was paid on the first day of every month,I saved one third of my money into my account in the bank of China.I tried to spend the remaining money in this month.I didn't go shoping as often as usual and learned to bargain when I bought something.At the end of the first year after I began to work,I saved a sum of money and bought a few gifts for my parents when I went home on the Chinese New Year's Eve.My parents were very happy and I felt proud of myself too.

Now,under the pressure of financial crisis and high house price in Beijing,I try my best to save more money.Every month,I save my boyfriend's salary in our account and never use it unless we need a large sum of money.my salary keeps our daily expenses.we go shopping once or twice a month,we only buy the things we really need.We don't go out eating frequently,we often cook by ourselves at home.What's more,I write the details of our daily expenses everyday on the website:www.zhangben.com.Then we can know what the money is spent on, how much money we have spent,and how to arrange our budget in the next month.By our hard working, we have spent a large sum of money from the last year.We believe that if we keep on in the next two years,we can make a down payment on a house in Beijing.Thus,we can buy a small house in Beijing wihout our parents'help.

 Saving money is not easy,because we all like to spent money to buy beautiful things and eat big meals.But I think if we can earn money and save money to buy beautiful things and eat big meals by ourselves,rather than asking money from parants,we are great and our parents would feel proud of their children.

I insist on self-reliance and enjoy it very much.

April 13  sunny

Spring is coming,the weather is so good everyday and I feel very happy everyday.

Those days,the weather is all sunny,and there is a little breezee,people feel so comfortable in the gentle breezee.The trees turn green and the flowers are coming into bloom.

Every morning,I get up early and take a bus to Yu yuan tan Park,our company is near the Park,it is one of the most beautiful park in Beijing,I walk in the walk and do some sports by the bank of the lake.The ice which was very thick in the lake had melt,and the water is clean and looks very blue,when the breezee blows away,the surface of the water ropples gently,making the view so charming.There are so many kinds of flowers in the park too,cherry,primrose,peachblossom,tulip and many other kinds of flowers are blooming beautifully and smell sweet. when I walk among the flowers,a happy feeling come into my heart and I feel the life is perfect.When I finish exercise,I go to my work place and begin a whole day of work,because of good mood,I feel my work efficency is very high.

On the work end,I go on picnic in the suburb with my boyfriend,Far away from the noisy crowd,the suburb is quiet and clean,we rent a boat and row it on the lake, take photoes with flowers,have picnics on the grassfield.we feel so happy that we can always forget to go home.

The spring is so nice,I like it very much,I hope I can keep the hapyy mood everyday.But it is a pity that the spring in Beijing is very short,in a few days,it will get hot and the summer will come.