在武东路雅思班看到一篇好文章，供大家分享，特别是八月份的考生。
REQUEST：
Far too little has been done to prevent animals and plants from dying out. people today have noticed this problem, but few actions are taken, why do you think people do little about it, and what do you suggest to solve this problem.
essay:
It is suggested that people have been aware of the issue--lack of preservation for endangered spieces, animals and plants, but as you see , they placed little efforts to cope with the problem.despite the versatility and intricacy of instruments , I would pore over some of the most striking ones and offer alternatives afterwards.
One of the major reasons , causing people's inocence of protecting animals, is that the government did not function well as an educator, arosing people's initiative in shielding wild animals, which led to the consequence that people do not know their responsibility to prevent animals from dangers, and specific knowledge in guarding them. what is equally important as the reason mentioned above is that media did not meet our satisfaction to inform the mass of the emergency which is crutial in arousing people's conciousness to keep animals safe.
In spite of the serious problem, measure leading to profound improvement still can be taken. owning to the fact that funds are insufficient in some developing countries, developed countries or international organizations should shoulder more burden -- finacing them in order to capacitate them to accompolish the protection of animals. at the same time, education in telling people the way to make animals harboured ought to be focused on, thus resulting in people's better awareness in the camouflage of our planet's cutest creatures.
It is belived by me that if correct actions are taken to preserve animals, any kind of them will be far away from extinction forever
posted on 2007-07-30 17:30
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老师，我献上最终修改版。呵呵。可以话再打个分吧。
It is manifest that people have already been aware of the problem -- the lack of preservation for endangered spieces, animals and plants, but as you see , they placed few efforts to cope with the problem. Despite the versatility and complicacy of instruments , I would pore over some of the most striking ones and offer alternatives afterwards.
One of the major reasons , in rich countries, causing folk's ignorance of protecting beasts&plantlets, is that the government did not function well as an educator, arosing their initiative in shielding wild creatures , which led to the consequence that people did not realize their responsibility for creation's security , and have specific knowledge of guarding them properly. What is equally important as the reason mentioned above is that media did not meet our satisfaction of informing the masses of the emergency of keeping creeping things safe, which is also crutial in stimulating their almost lost consciousness.
But, when it comes to underprivileged societies, things get totally different and complicated. Authorities were facing a dilemma , availability for life-saving food or safeguarding the lower beings, because of impoverished living conditions of the citizens. That is to say, they have financial problems.
In spite of the thorny issue, measures leading to profound improvement can still be taken. Owning to the fact that in some developing countries, funds are tremendously insufficient, developed countries or international organizations should shoulder a greater burden -- financing them in order to capacitate them to accompolish the task of establishing preservations for rare animals and plants. At the same time, education of instructing the public how to make them harboured ought to be focused on in developed countries, thus resulting in crowd's better awareness of the immediate protection of our planet's cutest creatures.
It is delectable that more and more people are getting to know the significance of preserving imperiled spieces although few actions were taken , but if correct and instantaneous steps are taken , I take it for granted that any sort of creatures will be far away from extinction forever.
(336words)
我只能说用词太做作了。。。no offence but truth～
1号第1篇，小新老师，希望你能看到打个分
Request:
Some people think that schools should select their pupils according to their academic ability. Others believe that young people with different abilities should be educated together. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Essay:
It is irrefutable that the process of education is advancing at a breakneck pace. Therefore, there arises a social ambivalence over the ' hot potato ' of whether teachers should categorize pupils by their academic ability. To be frank , my contention is that according to the complicacy of the aptitudes related to different kinds of successes, students had better be organized together without reference to their intellegence.
Some believe pupils should be classified by their academic capacity because this will make the education more effective and efficient. The reason is mainly due to three aspects : fiercer competition , more complicated curriculum and the reduction of discrimination. Take the first one as an example, if students are selected by their lore, there appears to be a fiercer competition contributing to their enthusiam in the study , which may lead to the result that they spend more time on extra curricula due to their aroused interest. However, this view which in my opinon, does not hold water still need to be canvased.
Owning to the developing society , there is a prevalent trend of the preference of multi-skilled ones that can be only created in a non-classified learning environment. So it is manifest that students , not being instructed in that complex environment , can not get enough wisdom which could be extremenly important in the near future, resulting in some of the high-ability students might get in to a tight spot of getting a better job. What's more , the lack of comprehensive scholarship could be deadly in their career development. In China, for example, many people of the manager level feel that they often have difficulties in communication partly as a reslut of the classification of learners during their early time.
Although the categorizing of pupils seems reasonable to some extend, the significance of my viewpoint outweight that of the categorizing of the pupils, so in conclusion , I believe pupils from standard classes can make more contribution to the country than those who studied in the classified classes.
(341 words)
同意Kinn
我没有看文章，但是我之前看过的小新推荐的好习作也有同样感觉
再结合目前普遍考生写作考试并不是很理想这一点（尽管可能平时习作成绩还可以），我要奉劝大家写作这块平时的练习有走入误区，过多放在同义词替换（包括很多老外都不认识的同义词）
我想最后的结果是 即便你在这里拿了好成绩 在考场也脱颖不出来 还觉得自己委屈了或考官给分有偏差等等
切记切记
为何我觉得原文有很多用词不当.............
老师，我在研究许多国内的作文范文和剑桥系列的书背后的好的范文时发现一个问题，国内的都是特别框架化，像经常可以看到first formost ,secondly,finally,等，而考官好象选中的优秀文章似乎没有很明显的连接词，而是很自然的带过，希望老师解释一下区别所在
哎 我大作文这个部分也没准备 看到题目的时候眼前一黑
黑完之后发现我小作文格式错了 齐头式还没有空行......
-------大作文
我写了这种食物带来的好处
解决了人口增加食物不够的问题 种类比以前多了 味道好了
但是说他不好说得不多阿 说营养价值不高了 还有贴加物太多了
最后说我支持这种食物
不知道有没有一点点扯远了阿~~~~~~~
看到大作文的时候也懵了一下，结果还把格式写错了，不过在最后20分钟，终于回过神来，一阵狂改，终于在还有5分钟的时候finish了，但愿考官能够仁慈一点，给我个6分算了吧
小新老师麻烦了：
我是去年暑假上您的雅思全日制住宿班的学生，今年又要去考了（8.25），对自己很么信心，尤其是写作。怕今年不能达到分数影响出国，所以望您能帮我批改一下，并打个分。
PS: 有点急~~~~~~：）
Shielding the species which is facing to the extinction is becoming a prevail topic in the current society. At same time, publics are involving in this issue, whereas, the action to it is slight ,account for lack of fund support ,the lower powerful pronouncement and less behavior consciousness.
The economic development dominate the global and enormous cash have been cost to raise the productivity or the data of annual GDP, led to the part of finance available cannot be enough to invest this case of environmental conservation. Besides that, Public have comprehended that rescuing the natural flora and fauna ought to be necessary. While majority always ignore the significance of action, due to so little pronouncement on it that people haven't realy perceived it's an emergency to take an action. The last, as well as an importance, There are some difficulties in thus--"Practice what you preach", cited by a proverb. Regardless most of us surely understand resisting such situation cannot be delayed, However, It's suggested that people conver their thoughts into the truth is a hassle ,own to the short of a suitable accelerator.
Considering these circumstances, it will reveal the relative methods of the solution according to the cause above. First of all, we should lessen the waste to the least level, for the sake of setting partial finance to this item. Then, governments are suppose to enhance the strength of announcement ,such as utilizing the advertisement. Finally the relevant sectors may organize some valid activities as to make more people to participate in the action to protect our ecosystem.
I insist that only if less wasting , powerful arousal and valid organization, it is so many people that will join in the vigorous group in the forthcoming days.
(291 words)